|
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Missing MasonI haven't run consistently in a month.
When Mason died, I turned to running as a way of therapy/coping; as a positive outlet that would make me hungry enough to
eat; sweaty enough to shower; tired enough to sleep. Lately, though I haven't gotten up in the mornings with the
alarm. I keep turning the alarm off and rolling over and hoping I don't have to start another day without Mason.
But I/we do. I am still amazed at how tomorrow keeps coming. Every night I really try to be my own cheerleader and tell
myself that when tomorrow comes I can get up and face the day. I've been telling myself that
since Mason's year anniversary. I still have hope, I just don't have the drive. I know that life
goes on, after all we are living proof, but how do we pick up the pieces and make each day count? When
your soul is aching and your heart is broken.....(Can you tell I have a bad case of the blahs?) I know, I know, we still have
a lot to be hopeful and thankful for (Teagan and each other) and I really do know that and believe we will all be ok.
I have held my feelings in check for quite sometime and thought I should find an outlet, perhaps journaling, but anyone
who knows me lately, knows I have a HUGE mess in my house and that keeping up with a paper journal is futile! So maybe writing
here will help. Thanks for listening. I love you Mason and miss you terribly. Dad says, ditto. :) Forever,
Mom/Lori
10:01 am cdt
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Start of new school yearWell here we are again at the beginning of another school year and the start of soccer, which we all know has always been
a big part of our lives. Breezy is now off at FSU and already started preseason training. We believe
that Mason would be also playing at the next level since his UWF soccer experience would have been completed last season.
Tyler is still in the Orlando area cooking away and seems to be enjoying it. Our lives continue to be on the
new journey, which we all know is very different than we had planned. We continue to remember the special person that
Mason was and still is to us all, reflecting on the little girl that he leaves in his place to hopefully continue on the journey
that he has started. Teagan has been practicing her walking skills and has several times gone for her "solo"
stroll. She would rather walk holding onto our fingers than without. She LOVES going outside even if it is just
to walk some more. Teagan's words are the same, Dada, yaya and other sounds that we feel is a sure sign of our next
motor mouth.
|
